I Am A Mother

I am a mother, but I have never held my baby girl. My little girl passed on before she could take a breath in this world. My little girl woke up in the arms of Jesus. I am sure of it. I know that she is much better off with Him than she ever would have been with me. But that doesn’t mean my heart doesn’t ache when I think of her name. Her name is the same that I blog under. Vivian. Her very name means life, and she is living a life eternal with Jesus. She will never know pain or suffering, only the pure joy that comes with being in the constant presence of the Father. She is safe. Isn’t that the best that a parent could ever want for her child?

While I realize that my child is in heaven, my heart still grieves for her. She will always be my first born child. Vivian will always hold a place that is dear to my heart. I long to hold her. To hear her laugh. To see her smile. I want to take her to dance or piano lessons. I want to play with her outside. I want to see her creativity. Unfortunately, I will never get that chance in this life.

I am thankful that my little girl will never know the horrors of this world. The only emotion she will ever feel is that of pure joy, the kind that comes when living alongside Jesus. It’s an emotion that I can’t even imagine, but my little girl gets to live with it day and day out. She is happy. She is safe. What more could I ever want?

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